SCENE II. A street

Enter Lucio and two other GENTLEMEN

  LUCIO. If the Duke, with the other dukes, come not to composition
    with the King of Hungary, why then all the dukes fall upon the
    King.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Heaven grant us its peace, but not the King of
    Hungary's!
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. Amen.
  LUCIO. Thou conclud'st like the sanctimonious pirate that went to
    sea with the Ten Commandments, but scrap'd one out of the table.
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. 'Thou shalt not steal'?
  LUCIO. Ay, that he raz'd.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Why, 'twas a commandment to command the captain
    and all the rest from their functions: they put forth to steal.
    There's not a soldier of us all that, in the thanksgiving before
    meat, do relish the petition well that prays for peace.
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. I never heard any soldier dislike it.
  LUCIO. I believe thee; for I think thou never wast where grace was
    said.
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. No? A dozen times at least.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. What, in metre?
  LUCIO. In any proportion or in any language.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. I think, or in any religion.
  LUCIO. Ay, why not? Grace is grace, despite of all controversy; as,
    for example, thou thyself art a wicked villain, despite of all
    grace.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Well, there went but a pair of shears between us.
  LUCIO. I grant; as there may between the lists and the velvet.
    Thou art the list.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. And thou the velvet; thou art good velvet; thou'rt
    a three-pil'd piece, I warrant thee. I had as lief be a list of
    an English kersey as be pil'd, as thou art pil'd, for a French
    velvet. Do I speak feelingly now?
  LUCIO. I think thou dost; and, indeed, with most painful feeling of
    thy speech. I will, out of thine own confession, learn to begin
    thy health; but, whilst I live, forget to drink after thee.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. I think I have done myself wrong, have I not?
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. Yes, that thou hast, whether thou art tainted or
    free.

Enter MISTRESS OVERDONE

  LUCIO. Behold, behold, where Madam Mitigation comes! I have
    purchas'd as many diseases under her roof as come to-
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. To what, I pray?
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Judge.
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. To three thousand dolours a year.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Ay, and more.
  LUCIO. A French crown more.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Thou art always figuring diseases in me, but thou
    art full of error; I am sound.
  LUCIO. Nay, not, as one would say, healthy; but so sound as things
    that are hollow: thy bones are hollow; impiety has made a feast
    of thee.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. How now! which of your hips has the most profound
    sciatica?
  MRS. OVERDONE. Well, well! there's one yonder arrested and carried
    to prison was worth five thousand of you all.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Who's that, I pray thee?
  MRS. OVERDONE. Marry, sir, that's Claudio, Signior Claudio.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. Claudio to prison? 'Tis not so.
  MRS. OVERDONE. Nay, but I know 'tis so: I saw him arrested; saw him
    carried away; and, which is more, within these three days his
    head to be chopp'd off.
  LUCIO. But, after all this fooling, I would not have it so. Art
    thou sure of this?
  MRS. OVERDONE. I am too sure of it; and it is for getting Madam
    Julietta with child.
  LUCIO. Believe me, this may be; he promis'd to meet me two hours
    since, and he was ever precise in promise-keeping.
  SECOND GENTLEMAN. Besides, you know, it draws something near to the
    speech we had to such a purpose.
  FIRST GENTLEMAN. But most of all agreeing with the proclamation.
  LUCIO. Away; let's go learn the truth of it.
                                      Exeunt Lucio and GENTLEMEN
  MRS. OVERDONE. Thus, what with the war, what with the sweat, what
    with the gallows, and what with poverty, I am custom-shrunk.

Enter POMPEY

    How now! what's the news with you?
  POMPEY. Yonder man is carried to prison.
  MRS. OVERDONE. Well, what has he done?
  POMPEY. A woman.
  MRS. OVERDONE. But what's his offence?
  POMPEY. Groping for trouts in a peculiar river.
  MRS. OVERDONE. What! is there a maid with child by him?
  POMPEY. No; but there's a woman with maid by him. You have not
   heard of the proclamation, have you?
  MRS. OVERDONE. What proclamation, man?
  POMPEY. All houses in the suburbs of Vienna must be pluck'd down.
  MRS. OVERDONE. And what shall become of those in the city?
  POMPEY. They shall stand for seed; they had gone down too, but that
    a wise burgher put in for them.
  MRS. OVERDONE. But shall all our houses of resort in the suburbs be
    pull'd down?
  POMPEY. To the ground, mistress.
  MRS. OVERDONE. Why, here's a change indeed in the commonwealth!
    What shall become of me?
  POMPEY. Come, fear not you: good counsellors lack no clients.
    Though you change your place you need not change your trade; I'll
    be your tapster still. Courage, there will be pity taken on you;
    you that have worn your eyes almost out in the service, you will
    be considered.
  MRS. OVERDONE. What's to do here, Thomas Tapster? Let's withdraw.
  POMPEY. Here comes Signior Claudio, led by the provost to prison;
    and there's Madam Juliet. Exeunt

            Enter PROVOST, CLAUDIO, JULIET, and OFFICERS;
                            LUCIO following

  CLAUDIO. Fellow, why dost thou show me thus to th' world?
    Bear me to prison, where I am committed.
  PROVOST. I do it not in evil disposition,
    But from Lord Angelo by special charge.
  CLAUDIO. Thus can the demigod Authority
    Make us pay down for our offence by weight
    The words of heaven: on whom it will, it will;
    On whom it will not, so; yet still 'tis just.
  LUCIO. Why, how now, Claudio, whence comes this restraint?
  CLAUDIO. From too much liberty, my Lucio, liberty;
    As surfeit is the father of much fast,
    So every scope by the immoderate use
    Turns to restraint. Our natures do pursue,
    Like rats that ravin down their proper bane,
    A thirsty evil; and when we drink we die.
  LUCIO. If I could speak so wisely under an arrest, I would send for
    certain of my creditors; and yet, to say the truth, I had as lief
    have the foppery of freedom as the morality of imprisonment.
    What's thy offence, Claudio?
  CLAUDIO. What but to speak of would offend again.
  LUCIO. What, is't murder?
  CLAUDIO. No.
  LUCIO. Lechery?
  CLAUDIO. Call it so.
  PROVOST. Away, sir; you must go.
  CLAUDIO. One word, good friend. Lucio, a word with you.
  LUCIO. A hundred, if they'll do you any good. Is lechery so look'd
    after?
  CLAUDIO. Thus stands it with me: upon a true contract
    I got possession of Julietta's bed.
    You know the lady; she is fast my wife,
    Save that we do the denunciation lack
    Of outward order; this we came not to,
    Only for propagation of a dow'r
    Remaining in the coffer of her friends.
    From whom we thought it meet to hide our love
    Till time had made them for us. But it chances
    The stealth of our most mutual entertainment,
    With character too gross, is writ on Juliet.
  LUCIO. With child, perhaps?
  CLAUDIO. Unhappily, even so.
    And the new deputy now for the Duke-
    Whether it be the fault and glimpse of newness,
    Or whether that the body public be
    A horse whereon the governor doth ride,
    Who, newly in the seat, that it may know
    He can command, lets it straight feel the spur;
    Whether the tyranny be in his place,
    Or in his eminence that fills it up,
    I stagger in. But this new governor
    Awakes me all the enrolled penalties
    Which have, like unscour'd armour, hung by th' wall
    So long that nineteen zodiacs have gone round
    And none of them been worn; and, for a name,
    Now puts the drowsy and neglected act
    Freshly on me. 'Tis surely for a name.
  LUCIO. I warrant it is; and thy head stands so tickle on thy
    shoulders that a milkmaid, if she be in love, may sigh it off.
    Send after the Duke, and appeal to him.
  CLAUDIO. I have done so, but he's not to be found.
    I prithee, Lucio, do me this kind service:
    This day my sister should the cloister enter,
    And there receive her approbation;
    Acquaint her with the danger of my state;
    Implore her, in my voice, that she make friends
    To the strict deputy; bid herself assay him.
    I have great hope in that; for in her youth
    There is a prone and speechless dialect
    Such as move men; beside, she hath prosperous art
    When she will play with reason and discourse,
    And well she can persuade.
  LUCIO. I pray she may; as well for the encouragement of the like,
    which else would stand under grievous imposition, as for the
    enjoying of thy life, who I would be sorry should be thus
    foolishly lost at a game of tick-tack. I'll to her.
  CLAUDIO. I thank you, good friend Lucio.
  LUCIO. Within two hours.
  CLAUDIO. Come, officer, away. Exeunt