viii

They had lunched, and were again upon the road; and the bare hedges showed Patricia lands that stretched full of wood and copse and meadow into the farthest distance. From a high place upon a common, where Edgar had halted for the sake of the glorious panorama, she could see Hampshire extending upon the one hand and Surrey upon the other. She was very happy now, but her heart a little ached. It was the breeze, perhaps, that chilled; or a return of her old painful feeling of loneliness.... But as Patricia thought that, she knew suddenly what she wanted, and Edgar knew it also, for he put his arm round her.

"My old sweet," he said. "Never think I don't love you,—as much as any Harry or Monty; and with the same warmth. I do. You're everything to me."

His lips were very close; and still Patricia delayed, not excited, but welcoming, half-smiling, half-afraid. She was shy. She had not been shy with Harry or with Monty. But she was shy with Edgar. From him a kiss seemed almost ceremonial. And as she thought that, Patricia blushed.

"Don't let's go to the Stephenses'," she said, breathlessly, her head lowered. "I know why you want me to go there. Do you want babies so much, Edgar? More than you want me? You see, I'm ... I know I'm conceited and horrible ... but it's because I feel so worthless." Lower and lower sank her head, to his breast, and she was held close to Edgar's heart. "Funny heart, to beat," she said. "You do love me, don't you.... Really love me...."

"Really," he swore. "All my heart."

"And you think I'm an idiot."

"Yes."

Patricia hit her lover a sharp blow of exasperation.

"And you don't think I'm wonderful."

"No."

She sat upright again, still within the circle of his arm.

"Has your car got a name?" she asked.

"Yes, Budge. Claudia named him; because at first he wouldn't. She kept saying 'He won't budge. He won't budge.' And suddenly he did. So that's how he was christened."

"Well," said Patricia, as though she were concluding a scene. "This is all very well; but ... Edgar, you do love me? And you'll try to make me less idiotic? Of course, I'm not in love with you. You don't attract me at all. But in a sort of way you're rather nice."

Her lips were trembling. She blinked away some tears. It did not at all accord with her anticipation of romance. And yet it was shot through and through with a beautiful tranquillity.

"I wish you'd let me kiss you," said Edgar. "I can't if you turn your face away. Unless I slew it round by force."

"Silly!" muttered Patricia. Edgar exerted force. Not much was necessary. Patricia put her arms round his neck, and they kissed, and then laughed. "Suppose we're making a mistake," she cried. "Suppose it's all wrong."

"After all, most people take a risk," said Edgar.

"I don't take a risk. It's you who take the risk," she answered. "You can be trusted. I can't. Look at the way I've behaved. I'm a rake! Suppose I ran away with somebody?"

"Then I should keep the babies," said Edgar.

Patricia looked indignantly at him.

"You're only a great baby yourself!" she said. "How extraordinary! And I thought...." She was amazed. It was a discovery of the most astounding significance to her. She had thought of him always hitherto as a grown-up. Was he then not grown-up? Her eyes glowed. "Edgar, tell me this!" she exclaimed. "Are you afraid of me?"

"I am," said Edgar.

"Truly afraid? And do you think I'm a poor insect?"

"I think you're the most wonderful creature that ever lived. I adore you," said Edgar.

Great tears splashed from Patricia's eyes. Laughing, she held him closely, and impulsively kissed the brown cheek next her own.

"Dearest!" she cried. "It's a dream. I didn't know I ... I didn't realise how much I loved you, until just exactly that moment when I saw you were nothing but a silly baby. But you're artful, you know! You're a deep one." Ruminatingly, she presently added: "I'm not so sure about those risks."

She was strangely exalted and happy, and her face was the funny face of a baby; and she sometimes could not meet Edgar's eyes, and sometimes boldly sought them; and altogether was mystified by her own sensations, and by the odd thoughts which came sparkling into her mind and on to her tongue. The two of them continued to sit in Budge and to be consumed in the marvel of their situation. Around them the wind played and the sun shone as it travelled towards the west, and the counties continued to subsist as if no lovers sat high above them absorbed in joy.

THE END.

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